Tough Life
by noaluvjames
Summary: AU-Sequel to "Tough Love", Buffy and Spike are starting a new life together.


Title: Tough Life

Summary: Sequel to "Tough Love", Buffy and Spike are starting a new life together.

Rated: R

**Tough Life**

"Smash his skull…snap his spine in two…punch his nose until he bleeds. Rearrange his face like one of those abstract paintings you've talked about. Shred him into little pieces and throw him in the river, make people search for his body parts for weeks,"

Spike had finally fallen silent.

"Feeling better hun?" Buffy stroked his arm slightly as they sat on the couch in their living room.

"No…can't I just hit him a little?" Spike pouted gazing at her.

"I've told you…you can't punch your boss,"

"Need to find another job," he muttered under his breath.

"Oh please Spike…not again…don't quit your job," Buffy looked at him alarmed

"There are bills and the ba-"

"Shh pet…" he eased her, rubbing her shoulders until he felt her relax. "Not gonna quit my job…not going to do anything to mess up things for us," he gazed at her and saw her eyes soften.

"It's not so bad is it?...working for Jim…you still meet boxers right?" she asked.

"I sit behind a desk and call their trainers…that's the closest I get,"

"Well it's still boxing …you love that,"

"The thrill of a fight, the blood…not a bloody PR job,"

"Well maybe you should do what my dad did,"

"What? Teach a bunch of kids how to throw a ball…not bloody likely,"

"Then you just have to deal with this one," Buffy got up slowly from the couch

"Where are you going luv?"

"I feel sick," Buffy, mumbled leaning on the wall on her way.

"Oh baby," Spike got up and held her shoulders. "Is it something you ate?" he asked in concern, gazing at her face.

"Oh god Spike…don't talk about food," she walked past him to the bathroom.

Spike stood by the door and heard the water running.

"Shouldn't they just call it pregnancy sickness instead of morning sickness…I thought it should be just at the beginning not all nine months,"

"Damn it Spike," he heard her behind the door yelling, "I don't need your quips right now,"

"Sorry luv…should I fix you some tea?"

"What's with you English people and tea?" she opened the door and gazed at him

"Do you really think tea solves all problems?"

"I heard Churchill solved a lot of problems drinking tea," Spike smirked

"God I hope she won't turn out like you," Buffy groused.

"Who?"

"Lizzy,"

Spike still looked confused.

"Our child," Buffy frowned

"Oh you mean Billy," Spike teased.

"Ha-ah…very funny," Buffy walked past him

"Come on luv…let's go to bed," Spike followed her and caught her from behind putting his arms around her.

Buffy melted to his touch and rested her back against his shoulder.

"Remember the first time you held me like that?" she asked squinting at him

"You were a lot smaller," Spike chuckled, feeling her trying to loosen his grip.

"What?" he asked as she walked past him to the bedroom.

Again, he followed her and found her sitting on the edge of the bed, her face falling.

"Buffy," he approached.

"You think I'm fat," she whined.

"Oh baby," he knelt down in front of her "I don't think you're fat,"

"But I am," she gazed at him "I'm fat and ugly,"

"Bollocks! You're more beautiful than the day I met you,"

Buffy sniffed and glared at him with teary eyes.

"You're just trying to nail the fat lady," Buffy mumbled.

"Hey… it isn't over until the fat lady sings," Spike raised a brow playfully.

Buffy chuckled and cupped his cheek with her hand, watching him closely.

"Don't ever change, okay Spike?" she gave him a dreamy look.

"Yes luv,"

"I lied. I want her to be exactly like you," Buffy smiled at him as she ran her finger along the scar on his eyebrow.

"And I want her to be exactly like you," Spike whispered and leaned in to kiss her.

"Ah, you lose…you said 'her' not 'him," Buffy chuckled before meeting his lips.

Spike gazed at her "You tricked me…i wasn't paying attention,"

"Doesn't matter… I win," Buffy smiled with a glint in her eyes.

Spike got up and pushed her gently to lie on the bed "You always win luv," he lay beside her and tucked her under the blanket.

"Hold me Spike," Buffy gazed at him "Lizzy will kick if you won't hold me while I sleep,"

"She will?" Spike smirked knowing the truth behind her request.

"Uh-huh," Buffy nodded coyly.

Spike moved closer and wrapped his arms around her, letting her head rest on his chest.

"Spike," Buffy said after a few seconds

"Yeah luv?"

"You can be a trainer," she simply stated.

Taken back Spike glanced at her face

"You think so?"

"Why not…you have enough experience...dad can find something…" Buffy gazed at his face and knew his spike mind was working overtime.

"You want to?" she asked

"I don't know…didn't really think about it," Spike answered calmly.

"Let's talk with dad tomorrow… see what we can do," Buffy rested her head again.

"Yeah," Spike mumbled still deep in his thoughts.

"Women boxing…no way," Spike glared at Hank.

"Well I never knew my husband is such a Chauvinist," Buffy stood beside her father and gazed at him warily.

"It's got nothing to do with me being Chauvinist. It's a completely different field, Hank tell her,"

"Can't blame me that your husband is an ignorant," Hank said to Buffy playfully.

Buffy smiled at Spike.

"Great, now you're both ganging up on me,"

"Come on baby…it will be good for you…you said it yourself," Buffy hugged him and glanced at her dad behind Spike's back.

"Yeah…that's before you told me I'm training women," Spike muttered.

"You'll be fine," Buffy placed a kiss on his cheek and followed him to the door.

"Bloody hell," she heard him mumble behind the closed door.

"Is she cool?" Buffy turned to look at her dad.

"Who? Faith?" Hank smirked "She'll eat him for breakfast,"

"You're evil," Buffy sat next to his desk.

"If you knew how much pain I had to take from him when we first started,"

"I have a vague idea," Buffy smiled and thought about Spike's big talky mouth.

"Good…'cause a little taste of his own medicine will be good for him," Hank set down and kept smiling while looking at the pages in front of him.

Spike heard a punching noise, as he got closer to the training room, standing at the doorway he glanced inside and saw a brunette haired woman hitting the punch bag. She put all her energy in to it, barely stopping to breathe.

Spike got closer and watched her in action.

"You're Faith?" he finally asked.

Faith stopped what she was doing and glared at him languidly.

"I am,"

"William the bloody," she cut through his words

"Excuse me?" Spike said bemused.

"That's what they called you," She said panting slightly. Sweat dripping from her forehead.

"And who are 'they' exactly?"

"Every one who saw Combs kicking your ass," she said unimpressed and continued punching the bag.

"Well it's nice to have a nickname," Spike muttered and got closer so she could hear him "but that's not why I'm here,"

"I don't need a trainer,"

"Are you planning on participating in any fights?"

"Participating?" she stopped to look at him clueless.

"Yeah that's English for taking a part, as in you fighting," Spike raised a brow.

"Then yeah,"

"So that means you need a trainer…" he determined

"I know, I was just trying be nice…I meant to say I don't want _you _as my trainer…clearer?"

"It doesn't look like you have much of a choice luv. Your last trainer left you. Let me guess, you scared him off," Spike mocked scanning her tough appearance.

"Actually I screwed him and then dumped him… apparently it does much damage to a guy's ago,"

Spike sighed; this girl was difficult. He really did not have time or stamina for this.

"You know what pet," he took a step back "you're right…good luck finding a new trainer,"

And with that, he turned to leave.

"Why did you hesitate?" Faith asked him suddenly as he was already standing at the doorway ready to go.

"What?" Spike turned to look at her.

"At the fight with Combs…you were fine but then you paused, like you were blacking out…what happened?"

Spike approached her not sure what to say.

"I saw my wife," he replied staring at her.

"Some wife…to make you lose your balance like that," Faith said, a ghost of a smile on her face.

"She wasn't my wife then," Spike smiled thinking of the woman he loved.

"I see," Faith gazed at him as if she was trying to read his mind.

"Alright then," Spike turned to leave again.

"Wait," Faith stopped him "I think I want you to be my trainer,"

Spike smirked at her "Alright…but first I need to see what you made of,"

"Bring it,"

"Do you think I'm stupid?"

"Come on, it so bloody obvious,"

"There's no way," Faith, said stunned

Spike smirked

"Combs is gay?" she said puzzled.

"Came out six month ago,"

"Dude this is….no wonder he touched you up so much at the fight,"

"You mean with his fist,"

"That too," Faith said laughing.

"Buffy," Spike noticed His wife standing at the doorway.

"Am I interrupting something?" Buffy said coldly.

"No come in luv…this is-"

"Faith," Buffy stated, "We talked on the phone….nice to meet you,"

"Likewise b," Faith watched her closely, examining her stomach.

"So… how are you two getting along?" Buffy broke a moment of silence

"We're doing okay…I think," Spike gazed at Faith

"Yeah," Faith smiled, glaring at Buffy "Hank knows all the cool boxers,"

"Yeah," Buffy muttered glancing at Faith's tight top, which didn't cover much of her.

"So are you coming to lunch honey?" Buffy turned to look at Spike

"Um…we kinda have more work to do," Spike mumbled noticing the anxious look in her eyes.

"So you gonna skip lunch?"

"No. I'll eat later,"

"Okay but come home to lunch…I don't want you eating the deli across the street,"

"Alright luv," Spike said and kissed her goodbye

"Okay…bye Faith," Buffy glanced at her before leaving.

"Bye," Faith muttered looking at her and then at the man before her with a grin.

"Cute," Faith said gazing at him

"What?" Spike asked bemused

"The way she's got you whipped…I like it,"

"I'm not whipped," Spike frowned and moved to rest his hand on the punching bag.

"Wa-p-sssh" Faith did a whipping sound "like a good horsey…. and believe me, I know all about riding,"

"Do you now?" Spike asked mildly intrigued

"Please…" Faith watched him closely "I can ride a guy until…"

"You know what?" Spike cut through her words "I don't really need to know...lets concentrate on training," he muttered and moved away, standing next to the punching bag.

"You're the boss," Faith gazed at his frozen face and then at the ring on his finger.

_Interesting…_

"I love you," Spike whispered in Buffy's ear, as he lay spooned behind her.

"Does that hurt baby?" he asked caressing her.

"No it feels good," she moaned, feeling his lower body's slow movements.

"You're beautiful …more beautiful every day…every time I look at you," he said huskily nuzzling her neck and tightening his grip around her waist

"Not the breasts honey," she flinched in pain

"Sorry luv," he ran his hand along her stomach and tried to keep himself from ravishing her completely.

"Do you have any idea what it's doing to me…" he panted speeding his movements a little "You, bearing my child?" he said in a low tone, his voice strangled with emotion

"Tell me," Buffy arched her back against him, feeling her heart racing.

"It makes me burn…oh god Buffy… you make me so hot," he breathed to her ear.

"M-Me looking like an elephant is turning you on?" she panted hard barely saying the words.

"Yes," Spike rested his forehead against her cheek and held her close to his body.

"You freak," Buffy, muttered trying to tease him but too caught up in her emotions

"Buffy," he gasped overwhelmed by pleasure.

"William," she turned to look at him wide eyed, wanting to show him the bliss he was giving her,"

"Love you so much,"

No matter how many times he said it, it still had the same inflaming effect on her heart.

"I love you too," she smiled at him her body relaxing.

Spike leaned to kiss her gently but broke the kiss feeling the need to see her face.

"I love it when you call me William, only you… "

"My treasure," Buffy mumbled watching his blue orbs, running her fingers over his face.

"Yours Buffy, for ever yours," he kissed her hand and closed his eyes, resting his head on the pillow beside her.

There is always a look in his eyes, a look she never got before and never thought she'd get as long as she lived. He is the only one who masters this look and she knows it reflects the love and commitment he feels for her. He swears to it, not just to god and the entire world, but to her. There was an unspoken vow between them, which they had both memorized from the day they'd met.

_"Faith is kinda pretty,"_

_"I haven't noticed,_"

So why was she testing him?

He'd been spending most of his days training a hot well-muscled brunette, while she was sitting on her couch eating like a cow and talking to her unborn fetus. Every time she came for a visit she found them giggling or just sweating together…_fighting sweating oh god_…. However, that wasn't the worst part. The worst had happened yesterday when she came and found them sitting and talking, talking the way they used to talk. He gave Faith his attentive mesmerizing stare, the one where he tilted his head and stared at you with dark blue eyes …she couldn't believe him. She really could have punched him at that moment.

Now she was heading there again, she really didn't know how she'd have reacted if she'd found then in a friendly position. _Guh _why was she so jealous when she knew she didn't have a reason to be…

"Are you always panting so hard?" Spike asked watching her closely.

"Just when I have a reason to be… like now," Faith grinned and leaned forward.

"Faith… you really need to stop," Spike, panted as well, dropping his head down.

"Why should I…it feels good…and I know you like it too. Don't you?"

"Yeah I do but Buffy…"

"What Buffy don't know… can't hurt her right?"

"You bitch,"

Both Spike and Faith turned to see Buffy approaching from the doorway. She was coming full speed towards Faith, lashing at her as Spike stopped her.

"Buffy what are you doing?" Spike gazed at her, gripping her shoulders.

"I'm gonna kick her ass,"

"You're pregnant and she's a trained boxer,"

"Oh yeah well' I have some fighting skills of my own," Buffy struggled in his arms.

Faith looked at her bemused.

"Pet, just relax," Spike gazed at her face in wonder.

"Yeah B chill...you're gonna make your water break," Faith was still confused.

"Oh I'll break something all right," Buffy, said harshly coming towards her again.

"Man… she's like a lioness or something," Faith watched her, even more amused as Spike held her again "protecting her cubs…I like her," she stated.

"Buffy..." Spike realized the source of her anger "Faith and were talking about smoking,"

"Smoking" Buffy gazed at his face "you've been smoking again?"

"Yes," Spike replied gazing down at the floor, slightly ashamed.

"Thank god," Buffy blurted.

Spike looked at her and raised a brow.

"I mean bad, bad Spike," she said feeling her cheeks growing red.

"You thought I was cheating on you?" he watched her, looking offended.

Faith watched dazedly as the two stared at each other in silence.

"I think I'll go for a walk," she said gazing between them "don't mind me," she muttered when she got no response and headed to the exit.

"You thought I was cheating on you?" Spike repeated as if he couldn't believe his own words.

"No," Buffy tried to protest unsuccessfully.

"Yes you did! You thought I was cheating on you…you think I'd do that?" he said more angrily.

"Because you don't lie about smoking… or drinking or eating at the deli across the street," Buffy stuttered trying to lighten the mood, but could still see the anger in his face.

"Lying about eating exotic food doesn't equal cheating," he narrowed his eyes at her.

"I know," Buffy replied quietly, biting her lip.

"I can't believe this," Spike muttered, still watching her in amazement.

"I wasn't really thinking," Buffy, mumbled staring at his face "It's just Faith. I was afraid she'd try seducing you or something,"

"But you should trust me Buffy,"

"I do," Buffy, said firmly "It-it's just this pregnancy it's making me crazy,"

"Don't use it as an excuse,"

"I'm not,"

"I thought we'd made progress," he muttered gazing at his feet.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that I always have to make things alright while you are being indecisive and insecure," he looked up to her and saw her face getting red.

"Me? Indecisive? That's from a man who's never gone through with a plan because he always gets bored before it starts,"

"I don't get bored! I just like to do things differently,"

"You mean impulsively and stupidly,"

"At least I don't drag things along by examining every single detail…'oh Spike look at this crib," Spike started imitating her "isn't it beautiful, oh but I 'm not sure about the color, it doesn't match our carpet," Spike frowned

"Well at least it wasn't the atrocious baby crib you wanted, the one that looked like a little coffin"

"It was a standard crib, safe,"

"Whatever,"

"Don't 'whatever' me summers,"

"So I'm Summers now?"

"God you can be such a bitch sometimes," Spike muttered

Buffy gasped at his words "Are you planning on talking like that in front of our child?" She stared at him angrily.

"No… dammit Buffy! You know I wouldn't…oh bloody hell," Spike gazed away trying to stop himself from cursing again.

"That was very nice Spike," Buffy turned to leave

"Wait," Spike jumped to stop her and grabbed her arm

"No, leave me,"

"Buffy…"

"Ahhh," Buffy flinched and leaned forward.

"Buffy! What is it?"

"The baby…Ow ow ow…" she held her stomach and closed her eyes in pain.

"Come here luv, let's sit you down," Spike put his arm around her.

"No Spike I think we need to go to the hospital,"

"But it's early…the doctor said…"

"Spike, car, NOW!" Buffy squeezed his arm hard.

"Alright pet don't panic," Spike led her way slowly "breathe luv breathe," he said, starting to breathe in and out trying to stay calm.

Buffy watched him and raised a brow "I thought you weren't paying attention to that stuff,"

"Please luv…I mastered that breathing routine," Spike smirked

Buffy smiled slightly and then flinched again

"Alright, let's hurry kitten," Spike said in concern and they resumed walking.

"Bloody hell…"

"What is it?" Buffy watched Spike from the back seat of the car. She heard him mumble a few times, but each time she asked him about it he told her everything was okay.

"Spike, are we nearly there?" she asked putting her feet up on the seat, feeling another contraction coming.

Spike heard her yelp

"You alright pet?" Spike glanced at the mirror

"Step. On. It." Buffy took a breath with each word.

"I'm doing my best luv, but the traffic…"

"I don't care about the fuckin traffic!"

"Hey, hey, language…" Spike smirked remembering her words from before.

"Spike…." Buffy said in a harsh tone "if you don't get us to the hospital soon, you are going to deliver this baby!"

"Right then," Spike watched the road and put his foot down on the accelerator.

Buffy let her head fall back. She remembered when her mom used to tell her about the day she was born, and how she was born early…I guess it's not that unusual she thought…it seemed like yesterday. Sometimes she had trouble believing her mom was gone…she wished she could share this with her…she could really use some reassurances right now.

She knew Spike would always be there for her and give her all the support she needed, but sometimes she just needed her mommy to tell her everything would be alright.

Especially now when Spike was driving all over town like a mad man…

_How the hell did we get here? _

**8 months before…**

Spike opened a drawer and noticed Buffy's underwear lying inside it.

"You've moved in," he stated.

Buffy raised her head from the pillow, yawning.

"When did this happen?" he muttered gazing at her

"Umm… a couple months ago," she gave him a weary smile "you didn't notice you don't have that weird odour in the house anymore?"

"Yeah..." Spike crawled back to bed and smiled at her "Gunn said something about that,"

"I love you in the morning," he said after a moment.

"Just in the morning?" Buffy pouted.

Spike smirked and crawled up towards her

"Morning," he gave her a peck on the lips "noon," he said and kissed her neck feeling her giggling "and night," he continued kissing down her collarbone, and then he gazed up at her

"Every bloody minute of the day,"

"That's good to know," Buffy smiled and moved away.

"Where are you going?" Spike asked watching her get up from the bed

"Bathroom," she said putting her slippers on "and by the way the weird smell," she glanced at him before walking away "was cat poop,"

Spike lay back on the bed and sighed in resentment.

A minute after Buffy got inside the bathroom and closed the door behind her, she heard him yelling. "I don't have a cat!"

She shook her head smiling, gazing at the mirror.

"Day 36….I'm never that late," she mumbled to herself.

Looking down she hesitated for a moment before opening the drawer and taking out a home pregnancy test

"Time to know for sure," she held it in her hand and looked at her reflection in the mirror again.

Buffy went to the kitchen and found Spike in there.

"Got fresh coffee for you pet," Spike glanced in her direction

"Thanks," Buffy sat by the table and sighed.

Spike poured the coffee and handed Buffy the cup

"Everything alright?" he noticed the frown on her face.

Buffy met his gaze and nodded, taking the cup from his hand.

"I know that look…what's wrong?" Spike sat next to her.

"Nothing," Buffy mumbled knowing her answer wouldn't satisfy his curiosity. After all, she was talking to Spike.

"I know what this is," Spike took a sip from his coffee and watched her.

"You're worried about the fight…but I told you baby, this fight is piece of cake after what we've been through,"

Buffy frowned even harder.

_Here's an aspect I haven't thought about….._

"I just wish… you'd stop," Buffy said softly

"I know baby, I know it worries you…maybe-maybe someday…"

"No, let's not talk about it," Buffy cut him off "I want you to know I'll support you whatever you do,"

"I know that too darling," Spike smiled and took her hand in his.

Buffy smiled at him briefly

"Where are you going?" She asked as he stood up.

"Bathroom,"

"Oh!" Buffy jumped from her chair and blocked his way

Spike raised a brow "Pet?"

Buffy panicked inwardly but then remembered where she'd left the pregnancy test _he probably won't see it_

"I-I forgot what I wanted to say,"

"You're acting weird this morning luv,"

Spike kissed her temple and walked past her.

Buffy sighed

"Yeah,"

By the time Spike left for training, Buffy already had the pregnancy test ready….she ran to the bathroom as soon as Spike closed the door behind him, but she stopped at the bathroom door like there was invisible barrier keeping her from entering…

She took a few slow steps and took the pregnancy test from the top of the counter.

Tears filled her eyes before she could even take a good look at it.

She closed her eyes trying to calm herself

But she wasn't hallucinating….It was positive …

Oh god….oh god…..oh god, Spike! What would Spike think of this?

Sure, he loved her and they had lived together for a while…but this… a baby…

Spike's baby…

Buffy sat on the bathroom floor and stared into space, not knowing what to make of this striking discovery

Spike hurried home that evening, Buffy didn't show up at the office that day and when he called her she'd told him she was taking the day off to do some chores.

Spending the day without her was unbearable, he didn't know how it had happened but they became almost inseparable. When she was away, he felt as if a part of him was missing…a big part… and it scared him sometimes. He'd spent most of his life alone, even with Dru he wasn't comfortable enough to let his guard down.

Then Buffy came…he felt naked, overexposed at times, what made it better was knowing she was feeling the same, knowing the love they shared was so strong it let them be desperately honest with each other…it made everything worthwhile.

When he came home, he found Buffy standing in front of him, wearing a weird expression.

"What is it baby?" he asked watching her closely.

"We need to talk,"

"You're scaring me," Spike followed her to the living room.

Buffy turned to look at him and paused not sure how to begin.

"You stayed home; you're acting weird…what's wrong?" Spike tilted his head to meet her gaze.

"I'm pregnant," Buffy, blurted without a second thought.

Spike froze

"Y-you what?" he said with a strangled voice.

"Pregnant," Buffy repeated the word slowly, watching his bemused expression for a moment.

_Oh god…Say something!_

"H-how?" Spike mumbled.

"How?" Buffy complained _that's all you have to say?_

"I mean….we used…you were on the pill and….well how?" Spike stopped his babbling and looked at her belly.

"I told you I stopped the pill long time ago," Buffy sighed "and there was this one time in-in the shower and – hell Spike what does it matter?" she snapped.

"Well I don't know Buffy-" Spike narrowed his eyes at her "maybe I wasn't planning on getting you pregnant…maybe if I knew we were taking a risk , I could have been more careful-"

"But it doesn't matter now does it?" Buffy said harshly

"No, it doesn't," Spike replied

Buffy shook her head and looked away. She couldn't believe they were having this conversation…she couldn't believe Spike's reaction. She knew he would be surprised but this…was he really angry at her?

"Look pet," Spike approached her and touched her shoulder lightly.

"I'm just surprised, I'm sorry," he mumbled before turning away

"Where are you going?" Buffy watched him put his coat on.

"I'm taking a stroll… need to think," Spike headed to the door

"Spike-"

Buffy followed him only to see the door slamming in front of her.

It was almost midnight when Spike returned from his stroll. The lights at the house were dim and everything felt quiet, too quiet… he thought

Spike entered the bedroom and saw Buffy lying on the bed on her side. He came closer and saw she was asleep.

He looked at the bed and saw it was covered with used tissues. When he looked at her face again, he noticed for the first time she'd been crying.

"Such a wanker," he cursed himself and crawled on the bed to lie next to her.

He moved closer and watched her face

"I'm so sorry kitten," he whispered and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.

Buffy cuddled up to his chest and buried her face in the crook of his neck.

"I love you so much," Spike whispered in her ear and put his arms around her.

"So much," Spike kissed her shoulder and pushed back to gaze at her face again.

Spike kissed Buffy's lips lightly and felt her shivering. He looked down and saw she was barely covered. Her short blouse was all furled up and exposing her flat belly.

He slowly ran his fingers over the bare skin, unable to control the rush of emotions, he kissed her again more passionately.

Spike broke the kiss slowly, feeling Buffy moving in his arms

"Spike," Buffy mumbled blinking a few times before gazing at him warily.

"Go back to sleep baby," he let go of her and covered her with the blanket.

"We need to talk," Buffy said quietly, still sleepy.

"Tomorrow luv," Spike kissed her temple. "Everything will be alright," he reassured her, "I promise,"

Buffy closed her eyes, taking comfort in his words.

Spike waited, making sure she was asleep before getting up.

Spike took his coat off, went to the bathroom, and washed his face, looking in the mirror he reached in his pocket and pulled out a little black box.

Opening it, he smiled to himself

"Yes…everything will be alright,"

The next morning Buffy woke up alone in bed, just as she was the night before.

She heard noises and the smell of fresh coffee, so she dragged herself out of bed and walked warily to the kitchen.

Buffy was amazed to find Spike standing in the kitchen, wearing only his underwear _and cooking?_...she stood behind him and smiled to herself. The sight of him almost made her forget about the events of the day before…almost…

Her smile faded as soon as he turned to look at her, she couldn't bear looking back

She still feared he was mad at her.

"Good morning luv," Spike watched her as she sat down at the table. "Sleep well?"

"Uh-huh," Buffy nodded.

"Good-good," Spike turned to her and put two plates on the table.

"You made breakfast?" Buffy watched Spike setting the table.

"Surprised pet?" Spike sat in front of her and put food on his plate.

Buffy watched him eat for a moment. She didn't know what do make from his behavior. He didn't look at her, but he talked to her like nothing happened

What's up with that?

"Don't I get some?" she glanced at the plate next to him

"Sure pet," Spike said calmly "but first…" he added and reached his hand out to put something in her plate.

Buffy looked at her plate confused, at first she thought it was coin, it sounded like a coin…but it wasn't ..It was shiny and little..._it was_ _an engagement ring_?

Buffy looked up and saw Spike smiling slightly, his expression soon changed to pure anticipation.

"Marry me?" he said decisively.

"Wha…?" _huh? _

"Marry me Buffy," Spike watched her frozen expression and wondered if she was even listening.

"This…This is because of the pregnancy?" Buffy finally spoke.

Spike gazed at her softly.

"No pet…It's because I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you,"

Buffy looked as if she were digesting his words.

Spike got up from his chair and kneeled before her. He took the ring in his hand and made her look at him.

"I can't imagine my life without you Buffy…hell, I can't imagine my life before you,"

Spike gazed into Buffy's eyes "I never had the reputation of a thinker. I lived each day as if it was the last one. I've made a lot of mistakes, a lot of wrong bloody calls but there's only one thing I've ever been sure of you…"

"Spike…"

"No, let me finish,"

"This might have happened sooner than I thought, but it was going to happen, I've known it since the day I met you,"

"But yesterday…"

"Yesterday I went through that door and as soon as it closed behind me, I knew what I wanted to do …there was no doubt in my mind," Spike stated calmly.

"It's beautiful," Buffy, whispered looking at the ring.

"Not as beautiful as you luv," Spike smiled and looked into Buffy's eyes "So what do you say?" he asked impatiently.

"What do you think," a tear rolled down Buffy's cheek

"I think you'd better give me a straight answer Summers," Spike teased and watched her smile

"I've told you once before," he kissed her wet cheek and then leaned to whisper in her ear "you give in to me and I would never let you go,"

Buffy grabbed Spike by the head and kissed him passionately, she broke the kiss quickly and stared into his blue orbs "I won't let you go either," she whispered

"So is that a…"

"Yes, it's a yes! You goof!" she smiled and kissed him again before he could say another word.

Spike let go of Buffy after a moment, he put his hand on her stomach gazed at her amazed.

"From now on I'll make only smart choices. I'll take good care of you…both of you. I promise," he said slowly.

Buffy knew the significance of his words

"I know William," she hugged him. "I know,"

**Present day…**

"It hurts!" Buffy cried out as Spike slowly helped her from the car.

"I know kitten,"

"You don't know shit!" she cursed and dug her nails into his shoulder

"Bloody hell woman!" Spike pushed her off his shoulder and grabbed her by the arms

"What did you do that for?" he helped her as they walked through the hospital entrance.

"I wanted you to feel my pain," Buffy mumbled and breathed deeply.

"I don't think that's possible,"

Buffy and Spike turned quickly to the nurse's desk, only to be stopped by a hospital orderly blocking the way with a bed.

"Can you move it away mate? My wife's in labor," Spike said harshly

"In a minute," the man said as he started to talk to the man next to him.

Spike was about to approach him but Buffy had beaten him to it.

"Look buddy…" Buffy held the man's collar. "I'm going to give birth in a matter of minutes. Unless you want a life time experience, you better move out of my fuckin' way!"

The man moved aside letting the two get through

"I guess we know who's wearing the pants in your family," he smirked at Spike

"Hey…" Spike turned to him.

"Spike!" Buffy yelled down the corridor.

Spike decided to ignore him and ran to catch up with Buffy.

"Help me," Buffy pleaded to the nurse who'd approached her.

The nurse helped Buffy to sit in a wheelchair and asked her a few questions

"It's going to be alright luv," Spike knelt in front of her.

"Sir, we need to take her to the delivery room,"

"Can I come?"

Spike paced nervously at the hallway. He couldn't believe he wasn't by Buffy's side, he didn't know what to do with himself. How could he just sit and wait while his wife was in pain...while she was having a premature birth…

It had been 15 minutes since he'd called Hank. He didn't say much on the phone, he just wanted him to come right over, maybe his presence would calm him down...

_Bugger_

He knew it wouldn't be the case. They both shared the same hot temper. They both showed the same concern and loyalty for the people they loved, and most importantly for both of them life revolved around only one woman, Buffy.

Buffy had changed them both so much and Spike had a feeling the baby would change them even more

He never knew he would find that much happiness, he never thought he would be ready to embrace it, but he was ready now. He felt whole, complete

And it was all because of her.

He stopped pacing as he spotted Hank walking quickly his way.

"Where is she? Where is my baby?" He asked eagerly.

"Having my baby," Spike smiled lightly, trying to hide his concern.

"Why aren't you with her?" Hank said, panting lightly.

"Could you believe she didn't want me there?"

"You should have said no,"

"To Buffy?" Spike raised a brow.

"Right" Hank agreed knowing his daughter all too well.

"Didn't want to upset her," Spike muttered gazing away.

"She probably thought you couldn't handle it," Hank teased with smirk.

"Hey…" Spike turned to look at him.

"You are super sensitive-"

"Am not…got kicked in the areas on a daily basis throughout my career,"

"Always watching passions and crying like a baby-" Hank ignored him.

"Louis and Sheridan belong together," Spike replied with slight resentment.

Hank put his hands on his face and sighed.

"I already feel like a complete wanker…no need to make it worse," Spike said quietly. "And that Faith...I should have known she was trouble," he added.

"What about Faith?" Hank asked curiously.

Spike hesitated for a moment but then gazed at Hank.

"Buffy was upset….she thought…"

"What?"

"She thought I was cheating on her, got really jealous, never seen her like that,"

"You can't blame her Spike…she already got too many people…**men,**" Hank corrected himself "too many men disappointing her in her life,"

"But it's me Hank...she really thought I could that to her?"

"You know it might have been the hormones. They say it makes women act irrational…whatever that means. Couldn't see the difference myself," Hank laughed, but then noticed Spike's hard expression.

"Oh lighten up Spike…everything will be okay. You know Buffy was born premature,"

"Yeah?"

"Always wondered if that's why she stayed so little," Hank joked and then added "But let me tell ya she was the strongest, bravest little girl I ever met,"

"Come on Buffy one more push, you can do it," the doctor encouraged.

"Ugggghhhh!" Buffy screamed at the top of her lungs.

"One more,"

"I can't!" Buffy cried out and let her head drop back on the bed

"Spike….i changed my mind… I need Spike," she panted hard.

"We can't call him now. You don't have much further to go. The head is crowning,"

Buffy shook her head and mumbled her husband's name, sweat washing over her face.

"Come on Buffy, one more push, a big one and the worst is over,"

"Spi---kkkke!"

"Did you hear that?" Spike looked up, gazing blankly into space.

"Hear what?" Hank said standing beside him

"Nothing," Spike shook his head.

"Maybe we should go get some coffee,"

"I'm not leaving,"

"Spike, this could take a while, hours even,"

Spike held out his hand to stop Hank from talking. They watched as the doctor approached them.

"Doctor?" Spike watched the woman in front of him with strong anticipation.

"Congratulations," she smiled "you have a healthy baby girl,"

Hank let out sigh of joy.

"A-a girl?" Spike muttered.

"I hope you're not disappointed," the young doctor added but felt strong arms around her before she could finish.

"I'll take that as a no," she smiled as Spike let her go.

"I need to see Buffy, I need to…"

"So what are you waiting for?" the doctor smiled and leaded the way "come on skipper,"

Spike froze by doorway as he watched Buffy holding their little daughter in her arms. He thought it was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen and he just wanted to capture that moment in his mind.

Buffy was looking at the baby's face as she spoke

"You're gonna learn about your father's lurking habits,"

"Wasn't lurking," Spike approached with a big smile on his face "Admiring…it's a whole different vibe," he said and sat on the bed beside Buffy

Buffy gazed up at him and noticed him staring at her with awe.

"You should look at the baby…I'm a mess to look at,"

"No you're not," he whispered, "you're glowing," he kissed her forehead.

They both sighed and gazed at the baby

Spike laughed lightly as he studied the baby's face.

"She looks exactly like you luv," he stated.

"No she's not…look at those cheeks!" Buffy corrected rapidly.

"You just can't agree with me on anything huh?"

"Where's the fun in that?" Buffy smiled at him

They gazed at each other in silence for a moment and then their lips met in a tender kiss.

"Thank you luv," Spike whispered to her.

"For what?" Buffy asked pushing back slightly.

Spike looked at her face intensely and brushed her hair with his fingers.

"For giving me a family, it's all I ever wanted," he said softly, as his eyes filled with tears.

"Oh baby," Buffy touched his cheek and rested her forehead to his.

"Now we both have everything we ever wanted," she said wiping his face.

"I hate to interrupt this lovely moment…" Buffy and Spike looked at Hank standing a few feet away "but I want to see my granddaughter,"

"Dad!" Buffy said surprised

"I had a talk with your doctor…she's a very nice lady," Hank replaced Spike's place on the bed.

"Gave you her number did she?" Buffy teased.

"Umm," Hank choked and gazed at the baby

"Well what have we got here," Hank smiled at the innocent creature sleeping in front of him "it's a little Buffy,"

"Told ya," Spike smirked standing next to the bed.

"…with Spike's cheeks,"

Buffy smiled at Spike brightly.

"Just don't end up melodramatic like your dad," Hank whispered to the baby

"I heard that!" Spike grumbled.

"I know," Hank glanced at him grinning.

Buffy smiled at them, tired but happier then ever. She'd never felt so peaceful.

She knew somewhere her mom was looking down on her and sharing her joy.

Gazing at the baby tucked safely in her arms she promised herself never to cry over the past or ever doubt the present

She was loved and truly blessed.

The End

Home


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